Jailhouse Catwalk

*Scene background music: https://youtu.be/A4Rr4IhTKwQ (0:00 until 1:08)*

I spoke too soon, again.

I thought I had been careful enough to whack Nadine when no one was looking, but somehow word got out that the local Priss was dead… and I was the prime suspect. 

The cops came to the house this morning and cuffed me in front of Chuck. I couldn’t look at him as they escorted me to the car. I couldn’t look at my neighbors peering from their windows and snooping from their front lawns. 

I was tempted to fight and tell the police officer I didn’t do it, but I didn’t have the energy. So, into the car and behind bars I went. Even dead, Nadine won. But little does everyone back home know that I’m working on a project. A story, if you will. The truth. Let’s just say I’ve got some dirt on the coach, and I’m itching to dig it up. Am I turning into Nadine? Perhaps. Only time will tell.

Caught Green-Handed

I spoke too soon.

In the midst of celebration, someone behind me rushes down the stairs and onto the court. It’s a girl and she looks vaguely familiar. Wait, is that the team booster? Nadine? She turns around slowly, as if she were performing an act, and she’s holding something in her hand. Oh. My. God. Is that my f***ing check?! She must have gotten it from the coach’s office somehow.

She looks me dead in the eye with a smirk on her face before opening her big mouth. Don’t you dare, my stare replies. She makes the packed gym go instantly silent as she screams the one thing I was afraid of the whole night: the truth. 

“If only you actually had real talent and not mommy’s money, maybe then you would get to play all the time.” Game over. Fury curdles in the pit of my stomach and fumes up my throat—I almost thought smoke was going to come out of my ears. Look at her, the local Priss Princess nosying her way into yet another person’s business. My son’s business. MY business. And she thinks she’s just going to get away with that? Negative.

Despite my boiling anger, one look at Chuck shatters me into pieces. He looks so defeated. Confused. Embarrassed. No, I think. I never meant to hurt you, honey. I just wanted you to have your chance to play. But before I can tell him this, he storms out the gym doors and I quickly follow. The silent packed gym is suddenly eerie and gives me goosebumps. 

I chase Chuck out to the parking lot and he screams at me to leave him alone. I let him down. I let my son down. At that moment, as Chuck turns his back on me and begins walking home, I decide to seek revenge on that little priss if it’s the last thing I do.

***

*Scene background music: https://youtu.be/cpbbuaIA3Ds?t=229 (3:49 until end)*

I wait in an alley behind the back gymnasium doors and the sky starts to turn purple. Am I really about to do this? I ask myself. But the second I see Nadine walk out those doors, the fury returns and I reassure myself: Positive.

I let her gain some distance before I race toward her. She hears me behind her and tries to escape, but she doesn’t have enough time to make a run for it. I swing my purse in the air and whack her as hard as I can on the back of her head. She goes limp and falls to the sidewalk. Blood pools under her forehead and she doesn’t move. 

“Game over,” I say to the corpse as I walk away.

Proud Money Bag

*Scene background music: https://youtu.be/gO4eF7oBZnE?t=124 (2:04 until end)*

As the boys wrap up warmup, the coach holds out his clipboard and starts reading off the names of starting players. I know deep down he’ll call Chuck’s name, but I can’t help but feel a tad bit nervous. With just seconds before the game starts and only one player left to take the court, the coach quickly glances my way—which is enough to make my heart stop—then nods his head at Chuck. His teammates and nearly everyone in the crowd gasp as they watch my son take his position on the court. He looks so happy to finally play, and I couldn’t be prouder to be his mom.

Then, to show everyone what he’s got, Chuck scores a three-pointer within the first minute of the game! See? Money can’t buy that, I smirk at the coach left in awe. Chuck finally has his chance to prove his spot on the team. I clap and cheer at every point he scores, which, I may add, is a lot for his first game.

Time flies by. The two teams are neck and neck, and the coach calls a timeout to draw their final play. The crowd dies down, then comes back to life when the players return to their positions. I bite my nails as the ball is passed to every player but Chuck before my son steals the ball mid-air and makes the winning shot!

“Unbelievable!” I hear multiple people scream in the crowd.

Chuck’s grin gets wider by the second, and his teammates smother him with high-fives and pats on the back. It was all worth it. This moment was exactly what Chuck needed.

Dressed to Un-impress

*Scene background music: https://youtu.be/_jiEz7M8VSQ?t=195 (3:15 until end)*

It’s finally Chuck’s big game, and I’m so excited to watch him play. I got my hair styled to look extra nice before heading over to the high school. As I am driving, I can’t help but notice a weird pulling in my stomach. Is this guilt? No, of course not… well, maybe. Look, I know what I did was (slightly) wrong, but I had the best intentions. I was just looking out for my boy—any mother would have done the exact same thing if they had the means to. 

I quickly dismiss it and squint my eyes as I find a place to park. So many cars are already here, but there can’t be that many people who showed up to watch tonight, right? The pulling feeling soon returns in my core, and I bite my tongue as I beat another mom driving a minivan to claim a spot. It takes me a few seconds to realize that my knuckles are white from clutching the wheel so hard. Calm down, Karen. Take a deep breath.

I make my way to the gymnasium where I hear music blasting and conversations murmuring. And just as I feared, the gym is absolutely packed. Nearly everyone in town came out to watch the game. Normally, I’d be ecstatic about so many people coming to watch Chuck play, but my reputation will be tarnished if they all knew what I did. Maybe they won’t even notice, I try to reassure myself.

With buckled knees and my heartbeat pounding in my ears, I sit by the aisle a couple rows from the court. I remind myself that I’m his mother and cheerleader for life—so, let’s put on a show and get this thing over with.

Turn the Page

It’s the classic love story: girl meets boy… who has a magical notebook filled with the names of murdered convicted criminals.

It all begins with a backstory: the boy finds a notebook and quickly realizes it isn’t at all ordinary: when he writes down someone’s name, they die soon after. He instantly falls in love with the notebook’s power and sets to kill convicts to rid the world of evil.

Then the boy meets a girl, and they become friends. The closer they get, the more criminals the boy secretly kills. The girl joins a research project to investigate the ghosts of the dead convicts and the person responsible for the death toll. When she accidentally finds the boy’s notebook, she must choose between their friendship and exposing the truth.

The boy self-surrenders to prove his pure intentions, leaving her his notebook. The story ends with a twist when she learns her father—whom she has claimed was dead after he himself was locked up—had a notebook of his own and killed the boy to get her attention. The final scene is of the girl with a pen at the ready, and she is contemplating writing her father’s name.

“Ghosted” Band Name

Despite my crazy schedule of chasing ghost stories, writing horoscopes and stalking celebrities online, there has always been a part of me that has loved music. The feeling of being completely entranced by a song or a live performance is like no other.

I have also entertained the idea of forming a rock band with some of my friends from college. Because we all graduated with degrees in Paranormal Studies, our band would likely be called “Ghosted.” (What could possibly be spookier than being forever left on read?)

We would write rock tunes with awesome synthesizer features to achieve a haunting tone and we would perform in all-black outfits to blend into the background. I have it all planned out… I just need some other members, and we are good to go!

Eutie Lornandez: ‘Titanic’

I was eight years old when I watched Titanic for the first time, and it has stuck with me ever since. There is just something so haunting about the beauty of Jack and Rose’s “worlds collided” relationship—not to mention Leonardo DiCaprio’s beauty—that gives me goosebumps. The ending gets me every time, but watching their love unfold makes me feel on top of the world!

Rejects on a Road Trip (St. Paul Edition)

Don’t get me wrong—I was super excited to go out last Saturday with some other International Rejects. But when @hubertalmanbert rolled into my driveway with his stupid black Pontiac at 10:30 in the morning, I just wasn’t feeling it. I could tell that @rodcentpeterclothcent, who was chilling in the front seat, was also not in the mood to go out, but I tried to keep an open mind when we drove to pick up @butterbelieveitbud, who proceeded to climb in next to me and face the window the entire ride. Weird guy…

@rodcentpeterclothdcent (AKA Mister Taste Tester) had been complaining in our group chat for the past two weeks that he’d been craving a bucket of Sweet Martha’s cookies, so the first place we drove to was the Minnesota State Fairgrounds. We were really confused at first when we didn’t see anyone walking around, let alone any grub stations set up. I was going to crack a ghost joke since the fairgrounds were completely barren, but I didn’t think it would have been appreciated. @butterbelieveitbud put two and two together and found a flyer on the ground that said, “Closed for the Season!” Who knew? @hubertalmanbert huffed in exasperation, and we all piled back into the car without a word.

At that point, we were all hangry. I suggested we go to Black Waffle & Coffee House since it was on our way and I’d always wanted to try waffle batter. The second we took a seat at the counter, though, we knew we were in for a disaster. Despite it being a waffle bar, BWCH served cooked waffles—what the hell is up with that? Talk about false advertising. Not only was it super crowded, but also none of us thought it was worth the hype. We ate our (cooked—smh) waffles anyway and after we paid, we were greeted with the scene of a hit-and-run, @hubertalmanbert’s Pontiac squished like an accordion.

While he started screaming and cussing at children passing by, @rodcentpeterclothdcent spotted some scooters on the corner we could rent and drop off at another scooter station. “Screw it,” @hubertalmanert said. “Let’s steal them.” So we did and decided to end the day at the Mall of America amusement park.

Overall, it wasn’t much of an adventure, but at least we got to do some travelling in the city.

Reject PB&J

This is an everyday staple for me since I’m always on the run!

Ingredients:

  • 2 slices of burnt toast
  • Handful of peanuts (shelled)
  • Handful of red grapes

Directions:

  1. Sprinkle the shelled peanuts onto one piece of burnt toast.
  2. Sprinkle the red grapes onto the other piece.
  3. Slam the two pieces together and squish down hard.
  4. Cut the sandwich diagonally—voila!